True Adult Anchoring Statements

I recommend printing out the True Adult Anchoring Statements and posting them up on your mirror, and/or other places in your home. It a great idea to have a copy with you throughout the day.

Read the above statements anytime you could use some support to strengthen your separateness and further anchor you as a True Adult

Speak them out loud, powerfully, so that they resonate more fully in your body. I like the idea of thinking of my hands as my True Adult’s, and putting them on my (Child) heart, solar plexus, or wherever might fit in the moment, then bringing the words through my hands and into my body/Child.

You can also creatively embody the statements by doing something physical as you speak each statement. For example, clench your fists and shake them as you speak. Jump in the air! The key is to do what feels good to you.

I recommend saying the statements in the morning, before you start your day. Saying them upon awakening invites you as a True Adult to welcome your Child to the new day. This lets your Little Adult know that she or he doesn't have to "wind up" to handle life, but instead gets to relax and let life flow; with a True Adult finally present, life can be very different than how it has been.

Say them again before going to bed. Whatever we put into our brains before going to sleep gets mulled around, looking for resolution and alignment. Reading the statements before sleeping is a powerful way to integrate and strengthen your inner relationship.

Some of my students like to choose one statement per day and speak it out loud or quietly to themselves throughout the day. Choose the one that feels right to you that day.

To complement the statements, consider the following Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) technique: Write a list of memories of times when you felt really good, and confident as a True Adult. Choosing one memory at a time, close your eyes and relax into a meditative state - with music or any method that works best for you – and allow yourself to be taken back to that positive experience again. See, hear and feel this experience to really bring it into you as a reference for what your Child deserves. You also have the option of “anchoring” this feeling so that you can more easily access it anytime. Right before you are in the height of the positive experience, press on a part of your body – your wrist, arm, leg, etc. This links the internal feeling to that spot on your body. After you are finished, stand up and shift your focus so you can come back and test your “anchor.” Just push on that same spot on your body. This will reconnect you to those positive feelings automatically and instantly. With practice, your anchor will be increasingly effective.

“Stacking” positive references onto the same physical anchoring spot adds power to the anchor. To do this, choose another memory that is a good reference for you as a True Adult. Once again, close your eyes and relax into a meditative state, allowing yourself to see, hear and feel this experience as well. Again, press on the same physical spot on your body to add this memory to the anchor you created for the first memory.

This is another technique that you can add to your tool box to strengthen your ability to maintain your separateness as a True Adult. Children always do better in life when there is an adult in their corner. There is nothing more healing and exhilarating than this relationship, which is the reference for what is possible in all other relationships.